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Saturday, June 18, 2011

I *should* be overjoyed...

We are quickly approaching Jason's two weeks of R&R, and I am working on finalizing details of all that has to happen while he is home.  There will be a LOT happening during that time, including he and I getting away for a couple of days, a wedding, visits with friends, and a few other small surprises to cram into 15 short days. 

I *am* excited to see him.  I really am.  I know that all of us will enjoy the time with him, catching up on the last almost 8 months he has been gone, getting Daddy hugs, snuggle time, and long talks.  I look forward to having him here to have another adult to talk to, and having that male presence that the kids respond so well to. 

On the other hand, I am also already feeling the dread of him leaving again.  This is not an adventure any longer.  The days are dragging, and I am just ready for him to be HOME for good.  I am tired of trying to sort things out by myself.  I am not good at organizing things, time-wise...he is.  He is a GREAT cook...and he enjoys cooking.  I don't.  There are so many little ways that I miss him...his presence, his smell, his hugs, his big booming voice yelling at the football games...the house is *so* empty without him here.  

Meanwhile, I am already anticipating that pain again.  Because 15 days is NOT enough.  And when he leaves again, we'll have another 4 months.  There will be Operation Purple camp in August for the 4 little ones, Band camps for the oldest two, Steel drums performances for Jon.  School will start again...Frances starts her senior year, Jon his freshman year, Heather will be in 8th grade, Justin starting middle school, Leah in 4th, and Katherine in 2nd grade.  I will be starting my second year of grad school.  We will settle into a routine again, and somehow will accomplish all that has to be done.  

But there will be a hole where he belongs...one that he gets to fill for 15 days...reminding us how much we miss him.  And then he'll be back to his work...back to being in a time zone that is 7 hours different than ours, sleeping while we work, and working while we sleep.  And, as much as we LOVE Skype, it just cannot substitute for having the real man here, in person.

So, honey, I just want you to know how much you are missed and loved, and how much we wish you could be here with us to celebrate you when we get up tomorrow.  Thanks for being such a GREAT Dad to our kids!!  Can't wait to see you SOON!!!

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