Happy Birthday, Nana!! (a little late, but with pictures!!)

When we were in SC for Christmas, we got to celebrate with Jason's mom...with a huge party for her 60th birthday. 

It was a lot of fun. 

We saw a lot of friends...

and made new friends.
...and generally had a really good time. 

There was good food...

...and good conversation...

...with around 100 of their closest friends and some family.  

I am SO very glad we were able to be there! 
Happy Birthday, Nana!!

Ever had one of THOSE days...

...when you wonder why you bothered getting out of bed? 
...when you are amazed that your children made it out of the house alive, never mind dressed and fed?
...when you teeter on the edge of road rage, simply because there is a road and other drivers are on it?

Yeah, no, me either.  Ha.

This is one of those mornings.  I want to run away.  Far, far away.  I want to beat on walls.  I want to scream at the top of my lungs.  Would you believe that ramming other cars off the road actually went through my mind this morning?!?  (Probably NOT good to do, since I was surrounded by HUGE pickup trucks, and I was driving Jason's little Honda Civic!).  I want to kick the dog AND the cat. 

I haven't done any of those things.  Not even close.  But the fact that I feel this way and that these thoughts are even going through my mind is telling a tale of stress over-load.  I am TIRED, beyond belief.  I am stressed by school.  And kids.  And bills.  And taking care of the physical side of being and doing all by myself for now.  Did I mention that I was tired? 

So, this morning, instead of ramming those huge trucks off the road, I yelled at God.  "WHY AM I SO GRUMPY?!?"  (I was in the car, by myself...I hope nobody heard me.)  I didn't hear any voices.   I didn't get rescued.  (Oh, how I long to be rescued from the housework, the homework, the yard work, etc.). 

Instead, I was reminded of a few things.  First, that THIS is exactly when I need to put on my big-girl-pants, and deal.  My feelings are lying to me.  I KNOW my husband loves me.  I KNOW that I will live through this semester.  I KNOW that my children will be fed, and clothed, and will get to and from school.  I just have to pick up and keep going.  Second, I have to keep working to take care of me.  Actually eating, and sleeping, and showering, and meeting with those responsible for keeping my head squarely on my shoulders.  Finally, I DO have friends who want to help...if I can just figure out how, and ask them.  Or meet them for lunch....in 2 1/2 hours...

Better get moving...the shower is calling...and Olive Garden.  Yum.  Must move.
(God, thank you for those reminders this morning!)

She misses her daddy...

...and wants to go see him...

And how did you....

...get that black eye, darling daughter?!?

"I fell down the stairs {at school} and kneed myself in the eye!"

Brilliant.  Graceful, too. 

The Explosion

One day last week, after the two littlest girls having spent HOURS in their room "cleaning" the night before, <=====This was what greeted me the next morning when I arrived in their room.

There were monkeys...

...and tigers...

...and bears (oh, my!)....

as well as dogs of various shapes and sizes,

a "Stitch" (wearing a diaper?)...

and a seal...as well as blankets and clothing for the animals. 

I think it is time to wean down the stuffed animal population again. 

Update on THE WRIST

Heather broke her wrist two days after her birthday.  (Note:  She broke it during her birthday party - she is blowing out <--those candles while waiting to go to the ER)

It was what the doctor called a "buckle fracture", and did not completely break the bone, but three weeks later, when we finally were able to get in to see the orthopedist (thanks a lot, Tricare), they put a cast on it.  That was three weeks ago. 

Yesterday she had an appointment with the orthopedist again, and it was x-rayed again, and declared to be 98% healed.  The cast was removed, and Heather can move her arm again. 

The happiness at having the cast off was short-lived...the itching that had been present but unscratchable (yes, I just made that up!) was now coming out in its full glory...leprous skin and all. 

All of the skin that couldn't come off due to the cast being on that arm for 3 weeks has now come off, and the skin on her arm is tender, especially after she puts lotion on it.  Oh, and the muscles are sore...seems they got stiff, too, after being unused for 6ish weeks.  At least now she can take a SHOWER!!

 
Now, she has a brace for 3 more weeks, and should be good after that.   YIPPEE!!

Happy 11th Birthday!!

My little guy is ELEVEN years old today.
**EDITED:  How could I mis-figure his age?!?

And he is competing in his first Geography Bee today.

And he's smarticle...really, the kid amazes me!!

He is constantly busy building incredibly detailed models with his Legos, making cars...

and trucks....
and planes...

and pod-racers...
and houses...
and bars...

and tanks...

And Justin is a really fun kid!

 
Happy Birthday, Justin!!  We LOVE you!!!

...And now that vacation is over...

All of us went back to school on Monday.  All. Of. Us.  I was ready for the kids to go back...what parent wasn't?!?  Me?  Not so much.  I found out that I had gotten used to sleeping in, and not having to be anywhere, doing things around the house that had been neglected. 

Two of my classes have started back.  The one on Monday...not ready.  I still don't have a practicum site.  If I don't have a practicum site by next Monday, I will have to drop that class and pick up another one.  I do not want to do that.  The one last night?  Not ready.  And that class is going to be the one that kicks my butt this semester.  10 quizzes, one midterm, two probes, and a final exam.  I'm already feeling a bit overwhelmed.  The one tonight...I am looking forward to, though I'm not ready for it, either. 

On the up-side, I have PICTURES from Christmas!!  And SNOW!!  And I'll get those up and posted one of these days soon.  Until then...time to get crackin'...kids to get ready for school, shopping to do, and a meeting this morning. 

Have a GREAT day!!

Happy New Year!! (and my personal whine-fest)

Here's hoping all of you had a wonderfully safe celebration of the beginning of 2011, and that God richly blesses you in this coming year!! 

Now that I have that out of the way, it is time for a whine-fest...I don't care what time of the year...I need to whine a bit.  Feel free to pull out the crackers and cheese...this may take a bit. 

I am tired of being alone.  Yeah, yeah, I know...there are 6 other people in my house right now, a cat, and a dog.  I am not alone.  But see, I am doing this married-single-military-wife-mom-thing.  And I'm doing it alone right now...because my husband is serving in a vacation spot.  And having fun.  And my life has not changed appreciably for the better.  Actually, I would say it has gotten infinitely more complicated.  And BUSY.  And not necessarily fun.  Yes I have my moments, and I really am happy that I am able to do this...but I want to feel sorry for me for a minute. 

I have one more day before school starts back, both for the kids and for me.  I anticipate going about 190 mph for the next 13ish weeks...with short breaks to catch my breath, but still running at a faster-than-average rate.  I anticipate the laundry getting backed up again, and the house getting messy again, and getting (nasty/upset/accusatory) messages home from teachers again...because I can't do all of this by myself. And yet meals must be served, and laundry must be washed/folded/put away, and children must be supervised to finish homework, and dog and cat must be fed, and if I don't check up behind everyone, every day, things get left, or forgotten, or ignored.

I know I am only one person.  I am NOT Superwoman.  Never had the body to pull THAT off.  Don't have the super powers, either.  Still, there is this list that is constantly running in my head of things that need to be done.  That list includes the things listed above, as well as exercise (because sitting on my butt is not conducive to weight-loss), and studying, and working, and visits with people responsible for keeping my head squarely on my shoulders, and grocery shopping. 

Meanwhile, I want to be pleasant.  I want to not be stressed.  I want to do all of these things, and maintain a relatively good GPA.  I dislike me when I am stressed.  I do NOT want to go back to that pit called depression.  It is not fun in there.  I want to have good conversations with my husband and maintain a close connection via email and Skype....which seems very artificial when I am missing the real thing. 

I know that Jason is in a "vacation spot."  Dang it.  I want to be there too.  I look at my other friends whose husbands are deployed to actual war-zones, and I feel guilty for missing Jason so much.  I told him the other day that I find myself somewhat ridiculous with how much I miss him some days.  I'm an adult...why can't I just deal with this, and keep going?  I KNOW he'll be back.  I know this is not an easy thing. 

And here is where I start sounding all whiney and selfish...He's in a VACATION SPOT.  And going out to eat.  And playing pool.  And going to the movies.  And I want to have the chance to do those things with him.  I know he's by himself.  And I know that in itself is a form of torture to him.  

I thought getting through Thanksgiving and Christmas was going to be the hardest part of this deployment. Apparently I was wrong.  Again.  Sigh. 

All of this feeling sorry for myself is tiring.  I don't like me right now.  I want to cry, and it takes listening to the same song, over and over, and over again, to be able to.  And that is short-lived.  Which is NOT satisfying.  I dreamed about him last night...that he was upset about something I had done, and was sitting at his desk fixing it...and I didn't even reach out and touch him, with him right there in arms' reach.  And I was SO sad when I woke up, and I couldn't touch him...I just wanted a hug. 

So, now that it is late, and he's not up yet to talk on Skype, and I need to sleep, I am going to go listen to my song, and cry a little, and hope I can go to sleep, because morning comes way too early.